When Do You Restore and When Do You Let Go?

Every leader I know, if they’re honest, must confess they have done something that disqualifies them from leadership.  Maybe it was a bad decision.  Maybe it was an ethical lapse.  Maybe it was a simple mistake. Maybe it was a moral failure no one found out about.  Maybe everyone found out about the moral failure.  Romans 3:23 (“For all have fallen short of the glory of God”) applies to leaders too.

I crossed boundaries as a young man that should have disqualified me for leadership..  I made mistakes as a seasoned leader that could have resulted in dismissal.  Why have I been allowed to stay in leadership while others have been forced to step down?  I was blessed to have some people around me who knew when to restore and when to let go.

Restore when:

1.      It’s a mistake, not a willful rebellion.

2.      The leader owns responsibility for his or her sin or mistake.

3.      Time has been allowed for healing for all the parties involved.

4.      Third party counseling is used over multiple sessions.

5.      Public confession and repentance (when appropriate) has occurred.

6.      The leader has stepped aside for a season to work on his or her issues and is now in a healthier place.

7.      It’s a mistake that can be easily rectified.

Let go when:

1.      There is no acknowledgement of sin or mistake.

2.      There is no attempt to make amends.

3.      Counseling is refused.

4.      The leader shifts blame to someone else.

5.      The sin or mistake, by nature of those it impacts, makes it impossible the leader to continue in his or her role.

6.      The leader involved will not make decisions to change his or her conduct.

7.      The leader’s position demands credibility that has been lost.

Factors not to put in play:

1.      Holding onto to someone because they are a “high performance” player.

2.      The dread of having to find a new leader.

3.      Nepotism, mentor/mentee relationship, friendship, external business relationship, etc.

4.      Fear that “we’ll never find anyone that good again.”

5.      Fear of other organizational or personal secrets being disclosed.

6.      Pressures from those not in leadership who are supporters of the leader.

7.      Although this should go without saying, hoping it the situation will go away.

Bottom line: Pray hard for God’s leadership, hold to your values, be courageous.

My Blog and Welcome to It

Not too long ago a friend asked me to drive one state over and give him advice about this church.  He would even pay me, he said.  I took off a Thursday afternoon, made the two hour trip, and pulled up to his church.  First thing I noticed – no signage to tell me where to go.  Now, I’m a professional church guy so I had a pretty good idea, but I couldn’t help but wonder how first time guests react.  I select a door (turns out it was the right one) and see a nice lady behind a sliding glass window.  She gets up from her desk, walks over, slides the window open and asks how she can help me.  I told her who I was and ask for my friend.  What I didn’t say was “How many times do you have to get up and down to open a window each day?”  In the 90 seconds I waited for my friend, I noticed the center table in the lobby (where all first time guests would pass if they found the right door) was covered the latest issue of Mature Living, a denominational magazine for senior adults.  “Great impression for families with young kids,” I thought.

My friend came around the corner and we dived into the problems he wanted to discuss.  I spent the day learning about his church, their setting, and meeting his staff.  I gave them a bunch of ideas, including a few thoughts about signs, windows, and image.  Most of what I shared was simple stuff that an outsider could see, but an insider may have be blind to.  At the end of the day, my friend thanked me for my time and insights.  His tone told me he thought the day had been a burden to me, a favor I was reluctant to grant.  Nothing was farther from the truth.  I told him, “I love talking about church, about leadership, and about working in God’s Kingdom.  It jazzes me!  It’s fun for me.”

I want to tell you the same thing:  I love talking about church, about leadership, and about working in God’s Kingdom.  That’s what wclaysmith.com is all about.  It’s written for leaders in all venues, it’s about the world of church, and about working in God’s Kingdom.  Anyone who serves in the Kingdom of God should find something of value here.

I also do a devotional blog, unlikelyclay.com.  If you are looking for my devotional thoughts, check there.  If want to know my take on leadership, church life, organizational health, etc.  this is the blog to check.

I look forward to lots of conversations with you!