I Wore a Tutu…

Pastors are challenged to do crazy things at times.  Sometimes, they bring it on themselves.  I knew a pastor who promised to preach from the roof of his church when it reached a certain number in attendance.  Now preaching from the roof might not seem too crazy, but he weighed almost four hundred pounds, so preaching on the roof took faith.  The church reached the goal, and he preached from the roof the next Sunday.  Another big crowd showed up to see if the roof would hold him.  It did. 

One pastor ate a live goldfish when he taught the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand with five loaves and two fish (I wonder why he did not eat two goldfish?).  A friend of mine promised the kids of his church he would eat a bug for every $1,000 they brought in a mission offering.  It may have been the first time a pastor prayed for a low offering.  After three bugs, he said he felt a little funny.  Not as funny as he looked. 

I try to avoid eating bugs and live goldfish – too much sodium.  I have been dunked in a dunking booth on a chilly Halloween night.  I danced on stage once to a silly song trying to shake ping-pong balls out of a box of tissue tied around my waist (Do you know why Baptists do not dance?  Have you ever seen Baptists dance?).  I have dressed in old robes for church plays and worn big angel wings.  I have done my share of silly things. 

This past week, our church had Vacation Bible School (better known as VBS).  Our great team did an amazing job sharing the story of Jesus with the kids.  My favorite group of leaders, however, was our Rec/Spirit team.  Let me explain: Every VBS has a block of time where the kids burn off energy.  We do this so the kids will have fun and go home tired.  Our Rec/Spirit Team dresses as crazy as possible.  One of the leaders, a normally sensible woman, wore mismatched socks, sneakers, shorts, a shirt, a crown, a blow-up floatie featuring a unicorn, and a multi-colored tutu.  This was the sort of outfit that demanded teasing.   

As VBS was winding down the first night, I felt like I needed to appreciate this leader (call her “JoBeth”) and tease her in front of several other volunteers.  This is not a recommended leadership tactic, but I thought it might help her feel noticed.  I called out, “JoBeth, if you wear that tutu on Sunday, I will give $100 to Finest Hour (Finest Hour is a church-wide effort to make 2021 our finest hour of generosity in the history of our church).”  JoBeth laughed, and I got a few chuckles. 

Then a voice called out, “I will give $100 to Finest Hour if you wear a tutu tomorrow night, Pastor Clay.”  The tables had turned.   

Before I knew it, the snowball was rolling down the hill.  Someone called out, “I’ll give a $100!”  Then, “My husband and I will each give a $100.”  In under thirty seconds over $600 was pledged to Finest Hour if I would wear JoBeth’s tutu the next night.  The spotlight was on me.  They say every man has his price and mine was $600 to Finest Hour.   

The next evening, I showed up and found the tutu waiting for me.  I was not sure how to wear it since I have never worn a tutu before.  Thankfully, this one had elastic.  Someone threw a green lei around my neck.  Suddenly phones were lifted out of pockets, and flashes were going off.   

The deal was I had to wear the tutu and the lei until I began to preach during our Monday night service.  So I went to the platform, shared what we were doing, prayed for VBS, said “Amen,” and then tried to slip out of the tutu.  I had never done this before.  I was unsure whether I should untie it, pull it over my head, or shimmy out of it.  I selected the shimmy option and noted the looks of horror on the faces of the congregation as they saw my gyrating body attempting to shed the tutu. 

Given the number of photos taken, it is no surprise that a picture of me in a multi-colored tutu has been posted on Social Media.  I am sure that I will soon get an email quoting Deuteronomy 22:5.  My response will be that I was not wearing a woman’s cloak; I was wearing a tutu. 

I am tempted to say, “The things I do for Jesus.”  I know better.  Considering what he has done for me and what he is doing for me, wearing a tutu is pretty minor.  If wearing a tutu helps one more person toward Jesus, it is worth it. 

At least it was not swallowing bugs.