W. Clay Smith

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Weaning Calves …

I weaned my calves about four weeks ago.  For those of you not familiar with what this entails, I separated the calves from their mommas.  This is stressful, as you might imagine, but necessary.  The calves have been nourished by their mommas for about six months.  Now the cows have new calves inside that need their momma’s nutrition.  Plus, the cows were bred as young heifers.  They are not done growing themselves. 

Weaning is stressful.  The calves have been eating grass and feed for some time, but they were still getting some milk from their mommas.  When you cut a calf off from the good stuff, they are not happy.  Plus, they were secure under the protection of their mommas.  The cows were not particularly happy, either.  They produced milk for six months and now there was a build-up of supply before their bodies recognized milk was no longer needed.  I have no idea how that feels, but by the way some of them bellow, I think it must be painful.

The first afternoon of weaning, there was not much interaction between the calves and the cows.  They were separated by an electric fence and were interested in their own grazing.  It was that evening when the conversation started.  I don’t speak cow, but I am pretty sure the calves were saying, “We want the good stuff.”  The cows were saying, “It is painful to hold this in!”

It took a couple of days for everyone to settle down.  The calves have caught on that they have their feed trough.  The cows seem relieved to be eating for two, instead of three (think about it).  The bull seems happy, because none of this impacts him, which pretty much describes every male I have ever known, including myself.

In Psalm 131:2, there are these strange words: “But I have calmed and quieted myself, I am like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child I am content.”  We read these words, and they sound so peaceful.  But weaning a child, like weaning a calf, is not a peaceful experience.  The baby has a bond with his or her mother while breastfeeding.  To break that bond is painful.  What is the psalmist trying to tell us?

When we begin our walk with Jesus, it is wonderful.  We realize we have someone on our side.  Our sins are forgiven.  We see God’s hand at work, a hand we didn’t recognize until we started following Jesus.  We see prayers answered.  We become aware of the supernatural.  The love of God flows around us.

But there comes a time when God says, “I want you to grow.  I want you to develop spiritual maturity.  I am not going to answer every prayer request the way you want.  You may not feel my presence as much.  I haven’t left you.  But for you to grow, for our relationship to grow, you need to be weaned.  It is time for you to learn a healthy relationship is not just about receiving, but also about giving.  I want you not just to receive my love, but to love me in return.”

It is at this stage many of us feel the absence of God.  We are tempted to stop reading our Bibles or stop praying.  We wonder why we don’t feel so close to God.  I think if we prayed, he would explain, but most of us do not seek an answer.  We simply feel the pain.  It is at this point I have seen people turn away from church.  Some even turn away from God. 

I wish I could tell you that this will only happen once in your walk with Jesus.  It has happened to me several times throughout my life.  None have been pleasant.  Each time has been necessary. 

I think I finally understand what the psalmist was trying to teach us.  A weaned child can be in the presence of their mom and not need what they used to need.  The relationship has moved to a new level.  The child can learn to be present with their mother and can give something back.

I’ve thought about when I was a child and I sat with Mama on the screened-in porch, watching the rain she had prayed for.  We really didn’t talk much.  We just listened to the rain on the tin roof, watched the puddles form around the avocado tree and the wind blow the orange trees back and forth.  All we had to do was be.  Those were some of the most peaceful moments I’ve ever known.

Part of walking with Jesus is to prepare for heaven.  Heaven ultimately is the place we will simply be with God.  Like a weaned child I will be calm because I am with my Heavenly Father, and being with him is enough.